Day 24: Gym/Jim

All in a day's work. Hi, my name is Christian Rosales and I am a lazy fat@$&. But recently, I've been working out with my best friend whom shall remain anonymous. Before I went to the gym (jim?), all I did was spend time on my electronics, laying there on the couch doing nothing but eating chips, they were really good chips. But then one day, my friend suggested to me to go and work out with him. I agreed and decided to start something new.

My suggestion for you folks is: life is short, make the most of it. Stay in shape, eat healthy, and stay off the devices for as long as possible. You only live once in this world. Unless you've somehow made a clone, then in that case give me that machine. I'ma create an army of me!

But no seriously, stay slim. You want your death to be nice and natural, not caused by diabetes or a heart attack caused by being too fat. HECK, some fat@$& woman killed her nephew just by sitting on him. She weighted 500 POUNDS! The kid was just 6 years old! Don't kill yourself or others because your fat tocus doesn't feel like getting up from your pee-stained couch!

This has been Christian Rosales. You've been reading from 326.9 The Singe. Stay in shape and lay off the chips! We don't need murders caused by suffocation from The World's Fattest Butts! And I hope your day is better than mine. I guarantee it!